My mom sent this - it hits home

THE SANDS OF CHRISTMAS
by Michael Marks

I had no Christmas spirit when I breathed a weary sigh,
And looked across the table where the bills were piled too high.

The laundry wasn't finished and the car I had to fix,
My stocks were down another point, the Chargers lost by six.

And so with only minutes till my son got home from school
I gave up on the drudgery and grabbed a wooden stool.
The burdens that I carried were about all I could take,
And so I flipped the TV on to catch a little break.

I came upon a desert scene in shades of tan and rust,
No snowflakes hung upon the wind, just clouds of swirling dust.

And where the reindeer should have stood before a laden sleigh,
Eight Humvees ran a column right behind an M1A (tank).

A group of boys walked past the tank, not one was past his teens
Their eyes were hard as polished flint, their faces drawn and lean.

They walked the street in armor with their rifles shouldered tight,
Their dearest wish for Christmas, just to have a silent night.

Other soldiers gathered, hunkered down against the wind,
To share a scrap of mail and dreams of going home again .
There wasn't much at all to put their lonely hearts at ease,
They had no Christmas turkey, just a pack of MREs.

They didn't have a garland or a stocking I could see,
They didn't need an ornament--they lacked a Christmas tree.

They didn't have a present even though it was tradition,
The only boxes I could see were labeled "ammunition."

I felt a little tug and found my son now by my side,
He asked me what it was I feared, and why it was I cried.
I swept him up into my arms and held him oh! so near
And kissed him on the fore head as I whispered in his ear.

"There's nothing wrong, my little son, for safe we sleep tonight
Our heroes stand on foreign land to give us all the right,

To worry on the things in life that mean nothing at all,
Instead of wondering if we will be the next to fall."

He looked at me as children do and said, "It's always right,
To thank the ones who help us and perhaps that we should write."

And so we pushed aside the bills and sat to draft a note,
To thank the many far from home and this is what we wrote:

"God bless you all and keep you safe and speed your way back home.
Remember that we love you so, and that you're not alone.

The gift you give you share with all, a present every day,
You give the gift of liberty and that we can't repay."

Is anybody out there?

I never get any responses, sometimes I wonder if I'm talking to myself. Hopefully not, that would make me a little nuts.

Yeah, so Aidan still isn't here. Obviously, or I wouldn't be writing, right? Today I was going through his closet so I could wash some of his things, and I realized that everything in there is pretty much 0-3 months. In the off chance that he's not huge, he's going to be swimming in his clothes. I think he only has 1 newborn outfit??? He does have tons of little onesies and those little sack thingies. I'm so ready to meet this little person, I can't even begin to tell you how ready I am for him to come out. I can't wait to read him books and rock him to sleep. I wonder if he'll have any hair. I doubt it - I didn't until I was about a year old. And I don't think Dan had any for a long time either.

Did I mention our house is *almost* put together? I'm really trying hard to get everything done before we have guests. Just this weekend we finally bought a shower curtain and other accessories for the guest bathroom. It's been bare this entire time. Definitely starting to feel more like home.

What IS this weather?

So Dan and I drove to Austin to go the giant Babies R Us today, and we had to have the a/c on because I was sweating like a mad woman. It was 85 degrees here. It certainly does not feel like Christmas here in Texas.

We didn't even end up buying anything that productive because I was way too indecisive. They didn't have the dresser/changing table I had seen online, but they did have one that matched the crib - only it was $150 more than I had planned on paying. It was $400, and I couldn't decide whether we should get it or not, so we decided to wait and think about it. We did, however, end up buying a bunch of decorations for his room. I'll try to post some photos soon.

I need to get in gear with my Christmas cards - we're just really behind with everything this year. We should probably start shopping for presents too, don't ya think?

No news....

Well I contacted the unit Dan's going to be with, and they don't really know anything. They said the Army is still flip-flopping as far as where they're going. It could be many months before they know. Summer-time is their deployment timeline. So even though he won't be home, he won't be overseas for a while. (*if at all???!!!*) Hard not to get my hopes up. We'll see.

Not much else going on. We had our first birthing class last week. Most of the info was stuff we already knew. I have a breast feeding class tomorrow, and then we have birthing class #2 Thursday. He's going to be here so soon!

Lots of news...

Well, we had our ultrasound. Apparently baby Aidan isn't toooooo big, although he won't be tiny. Right now he's around 6 pounds. Now I read on the internet that babies can gain 1/2 to 1 pound per week in the last month, so he still has the potential to be very large. I meet with my regular OB on Monday, so we'll see what he has to say.

In other good news, not so good news, Dan received orders Friday night to report to Fort Jackson, SC, on Feb. 4 to "support Operation Iraqi Freedom." Now we don't really know what that means, or where he'll be going. From Fort Jackson he'll be going to Fort Benning in Georgia where he'll be put in the 131st MPAD. That's a National Guard unit out of Montgomery, Alabama. I've contacted my own sergeant major so he can find out where the unit is going and what they'll be doing, before Dan gets there. As soon as we know more, we'll let you all know.

I'm just thankful Dan will be here when Aidan is born. So many men in the military miss their children's births and I just think it plain sucks. The Army really doesn't care about your family at all. Anyway - we're trying to stay positive, and I think Dan has been more successful about that than me. I'm trying though. :) Keep him in your thoughts - maybe he'll just stay in the US somehow...

Another pic of the crib

Well I finally got the matching mobile up, and I put the bumper in, although I haven't tied it down. It's all coming together.

Another busy weekend

Aidan now has a crib! I'm thrilled that's finally done. Now we just need to get the matching dresser/changing table, glider and a breast pump, and we'll be all done! This weekend we also bought Aidan a little Baby Einstein play mat. It's adorable...plays music, has lights, animals and a little mirror for him to stare at himself. I was playing with it yesterday. Very fun indeed. :)

We also got our Christmas tree today. We went to the same tree farm we went to last year. The older couple who owns it is so adorable. They sell handmade breads, jellies, peanut brittle, etc. They also have tutherball (which I played all the time as a grade-schooler), a tree house, and they give out hot cider. I love going there. Most people aren't that nice in Texas (at least sincerely nice. It's mostly a fake nice, but that's another issue entirely.)

Dan has a huge paper due tomorrow, so we're not going to decorate it yet. But I'll put up pics once we do. I'm wondering if little Aidan will be here for this Christmas...

Aidan's Baby Einstein play mat.

his crib along with some of his Moonbeam decor.


wooden letters from Target I painted blue. I'm going to attach ribbon and hang them on the wall above his crib .

Ultrasound is scheduled....

For next Friday afternoon, so we should know more details about little Aidan's arrival.

Dan and I are headed to Austin this weekend to buy Aidan's dresser/changing table combo. We figure one piece at a time and hopefully we'll have everything by the time he greets the word. Do you think white furniture is girly? I heard somebody say that the other day. I am planning on buying all white furniture for Aidan, but I think it's just innocent, not feminine. Silly people.

The last of the III Corps left today. Very sad indeed. I hate saying goodbye to people, especially under these circumstances...Now they're officially calling the war in Iraq a civil war in the media. I can't wait for the day this all ends, hopefully leaving the Iraqi people better off than they were before.

Big Boy...

Had my 35 week appointment today. Only 5 weeks to go! (If I make it that far.) The doctor said my fundal height is measuring about 36 1/2 weeks, even though I'm only 35 weeks. Therefore, he's sending me to get another ultrasound do determine his size more accurately. The doc said there's a possiblity he may be too big for me to deliver, that I may need a c-section. But we won't really know any more until the ultrasound. The military hospital is backed up with their radiology dept., so they're outsourcing my ultrasound to a local civilian hospital. They should be calling me soon to schedule an appointment. I'll let everyone know more as soon as I find out.

The weekend was a good one. On Friday I used my gift certificate which John and Heleena gave me for my birthday to get a preganancy massage. Oh it was glorious. Best present a pregnant woman can get, in my opinion. (THANK YOU JOHN AND HELEENA!!!)

Happy Thanksgiving!

I survived my first Thanksgiving meal on my own today. Granted I only made a turkey breast, everything turned out really well. Wow, do I feel old. Some of Dan's friends came over, but we still have tons of left overs. I must say it doesn't feel like Turkey Day. I had to turn on the AC. It was 80 and with all the cooking, I was sweating. I lit a few pumpkin candles to put everyone in the Thanksgiving spirit. We watched a lot of football, everyone took naps, and watched some more football.

What are you thankful for this year? I'm thankful for all my wonderful friends and family, and if you're reading this, you're most likely in one of those categories. I'm especially thankful for our baby, who I hope is going to be a healthy one. I'm also thankful I'm not headed for my second tour to Iraq. If it wasn't for Aidan, I'd probably be on a plane in the very near future with the rest of my unit. They'll be gone well before the new year, so if you could keep them in your thoughts, that would be great. I wish them another successful, safe tour in Baghdad.

Just about 5 and a half weeks until Aidan comes! Or possibly earlier, which is what my gut is telling me. But we all know how that goes - I thought he was going to be a little Audrey! My belly seems enormous - I'm sure it's grown quite a bit just since our trip to St. Louis. I'm also swelling a lot more. My hands, my legs, my face, my EVERYTHING. Oh, and I officially have cankles. So lovely, I must tell you. I've tried drinking lots of water and elevating my feet, but it's not doing much for me at this point.

So I've totally decided to rethink the whole "no drugs" thing. Something was going on the other night, not sure if it was Braxton Hicks or not...but it was painful. So if that was false labor, no way on earth I'm making it through a million hours of REAL labor with no drugs. Just not happening. I think I'd rather stab myself in the eye with a pen. Delightful image, is it not?

I really wonder how much this guy weighs? I'm thinking he's going to be a 10 pounder. He just "feel" so heavy, does that make sense? Watch him come out weighing just 6 or 7 pounds. I'd be thoroughly embarrased by all my moaning and complaining about what a fatty Aidan is.

You know what's crazy, even though I'm so big and I feel him move every day, sometimes it doesn't feel real. It's incredibly difficult to image a little baby living with us. A baby we made. It's just so strange and nearly impossible to fathom. Aidan really is almost here. Amazing.

Aidan has a place to sleep

I keep having nightmares that Aidan comes early and we have nothing ready for him. So in order to help me get over that, Dan and I decided to go buy a Pack N Play this weekend. Wasn't quite exactly what I was looking for, but we got a great deal at the PX on Fort Hood. Plus, no tax and they were having a 10% off special. Now baby Aidan will have a place to sleep if in fact he does arrive before January. We still need a crib desperately, but hopefully that will be taken care of in the near future. I'm hoping anyway. Here's a picture...

Still unpacking

Just had to include a photo of this baby Ram's jersey I simply couldn't resist buying at Babies R Us during our recent trip to STL. How adorable is that? I hope he at least gets to wear it a couple times.

What a mess...Can you believe all the stuff this baby has already?

There are still many boxes around our house, especially in the garage. That's ok, hopefully we've still got about 6 weeks before the little man comes. Dan and I both got sick again. How come we went to St. Louis and felt fine? I definitely see that as a sign. Anyway, Aidan's room is still a mess, but his closet is already getting full. It's amazing how much stuff this baby already has...

Things are still going well with the pregnancy. Aidan keeps getting in these strange, uncomfortable positions that make it difficult to walk though. Hope he's not trying to come out early on us. :) My snoring has gotten terrible. So terrible that Dan rarely sleeps in the bed with me anymore, not that I really mind having the extra room. (But don't tell him that, it's our secret.)

It's getting cool in Texas. FINALLY. But the weather STILL has to be crazy. Just the other day it was 90. This morning when I woke up they said it was 35 degrees. That's probably why I'm sick again. Stupid Texas.

Thanks!

I would just like to say thanks to everyone who came and participated in our suprise baby shower when we were in St. Louis. Here are a few photos from the event. Dan and I had so much fun and it was great to see everyone. Thanks again for your hard work pulling it off, as well as the wonderful food and generous gifts. And a big thanks to my mom who spent tons of time planning the party and managed to keep everything a secret for so long. Aidan already has tons of clothes in his closet. I'll try to post some pics of my favorites in the near future.

Oh-I was wondering if anybody has pics of me and Dan at the shower that they could email me? I don't have any. Thanks!

I'm 33 weeks now, so we have just 7 weeks left. I can't wait until the little guy arrives. My belly feels so heavy these days and it's hard to get in the bed now. I'll probably be on the couch soon. Dan's also tying my shoes now, it's just too difficult for me to do now.

Back in the Lone Star State

Unfortunately our trip to MO is over, and we're back in Texas. At least we have a working refrigerator now. They bought us a brand new one, and it's bigger than the old one. Boxes are still everywhere, because we haven't been home.

I wasn't thrilled to have to go back to work today, but luckily I get a 4-day weekend because of Veteran's Day. Thank a veteran, would ya?

Oh, and I know this is very late, but I'd like to do a belated friendly reminder about Breast Cancer Awareness Month. It was October, but so what. Do your self exam now, you should be doing them monthly. If you're over 40, schedule your mammogram for the year. Please. Just do it. :) Need more info? www.komen.org

We made it!

We're finally in St. Louis! We got in yesterday morning, and then we slept a lot. Today Dan's parents suprised us at the door of my mom's house. It was a fantastic shock. They're coming to our big pre-Thanksgiving bash tomorrow. Since I can't be here for Thanksgiving, my mom decided to throw a party for us, and it's turned into something much bigger than I ever imagined. Dan, John, Heleena and I went to Busch Stadium today. It was my first time seeing the completed stadium. It's beautiful.I am anxiously awaiting the start of downtown revitalization.

The drama has ceased, well sort of...

Well, we're all done with the horrible Country Place Apartments. WOO HOO! Without getting into long, drawn-out details, those people were absolute monsters. We checked out today. This weekend we rented a truck and moved all our stuff. What a nightmare. I've moved many times, and this was definitely the worst. Oh-and let me tell you, you sure find out who your friends are when it's time to move, especially if you're nearly 8 months pregnant. Let's just say I have NONE! Luckily, Dan had a few that spared us a couple hours of their time. I was moving stuff too, and Aidan was probably wondering what the heck all the comotion was.

Our new place is VERY nice. I'll post some pics if I can ever find the box with the connecting cable for my camera. We got DirectTV installed last night, and Dan is in heaven. We also got the HD option, so we can finally put our good tv to use. On the downside, we have a refrigerator that DOESN'T work. Very frustrating. We had to throw out practically all of our food. It made me so mad.

Anyway, today is Dan's birthday! He's the big 28!!! I'm no longer robbing the cradle. Unfortunately, he's been sick. I think I gave it to him, poor guy. We went to our favorite diner, Mel's, for dinner. We saw tons of cute little trick or treaters there. I can't wait to dress little Aidan up next year. I think he'll be a pumpkin. Just about 8 more weeks. So crazy.

We'll be driving to the Lou Thursday, so hope to see you all soon. Oh and by the way; GO CARDINALS! 2006 WORLD CHAMPIONS!!!!! (That still blows my mind. I was thrilled beyond words. My mom and I were watching together while on the phone, and I was screaming my brains out!)

I'm a total couch potato

Well, I'm just sitting here watching the Cards play in game 3 of the World Series. We're up 2-0. Just hope we stay on top. Wish I could be in the Lou for a game. Like I've said before, at least I get to watch this time. Work is crazy. Way too much drama and much too stressful. I wish I wasn't even editing, especially since I'm so huge now. I just want Aidan to come, so I can stay home and play with my baby. Sorry-our baby...Looking forward to coming home next week! I want to go to Babies R Us and buy Aidan some cute Cards/Tigers/Rams apparel. They have the best stuff. I could probably spend a million dollars in there.

I had my 30 week appointment today, yup, 30 weeks, can you believe it? Everything with the little man is just fine. They gave me a flu shot and a special tag for parking at the hospital, which is wonderful since it's constantly packed. I also got some meds for my lovely acid reflux. I've never really had that before, but I'm experiencing it daily now. Apparently it's a common pregnancy problem. Yummy. We also get to sign up for all our classes: birthing, breastfeeding, labor/delivery tour, etc. That time is getting close!


Our apartment is such a disaster, but I suppose that's life right before ya move. This is my 25th time moving in my life, or somewhere around there. Definitely something I'm used to. I hope we can find a great place to live post-Army life. I'd like Aidan to have a life a bit more stable. Not that I haven't enjoyed my adventures. See many of you soon!

Pathy

Ok, so here's a photo of our new place and one of our new Nissan Pathfinder. We affectionately refer to him as Pathy. It's a few years old, but basically looks and feels brand new. Leather seats and Bose sound system, which Dan loves. Anyway, we love it.

GO CRAZY FOLKS! GO CRAZY!

What an exciting night! I can't believe the Cards are going to the World Series, and I actually get to be in this country to watch it. Aidan was going crazy in my belly tonight, probably because of all the excitement. Yeah Cardinal Nation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

October craziness

Well, this has been the busiest month of the year for us. Last week we sealed the deal with our living situation. (FINALLY!) So we won't be homeless. We take posession of our duplex next Friday, and I can't wait to get the heck out of this horrible apartment complex. (here's a picture from the company's website, although we'll be renting the other half)It has 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms, much better than our current which is 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom.

We've also been looking for a baby-friendly car. So Dan's Accord is history, it was getting really old, and we have ourselves a new-to-us Nissan Pathfinder. While it's not new, it's in nearly perfect shape. Black with leather interior and a Bose sound system. (Dan's favorite features) Dan's still taking classes and we're planning our trip to St. Louis the first week of November.
Oh-and Dan's birthday is the 31st, so he can finally catch up with the old lady. :)

Things are going fine with the baby. After a weekend of barely moving, baby Aidan is kicking up a storm. I'm definitely not minding, it's a relief now to feel him busy in my belly. I think I hit yet another growth spurt this past week, because I feel enormous.

In other news, between everything else that's been going on right now, I've remained devoted to my beloved Cardinals. I've watched every game of the postseason, and I must say it's been quite a fun ride. I need to get myself a little red soul patch like Spezio.